IBTSOME Chapter 38 Part 2: Preferences
I BECAME THE STEPMOTHER OF MY EX-HUSBAND
Chapter 38 Part 2: Preferences
^^
After the meal, Lin Wei
Xi took a short rest and then took a bath. After she came out, she brushed her
hair, took care of her skin, basically went through all the troubles. After she
finished, it was already late. Lin Wei Xi was a little embarrassed.
Fortunately, she was the mother-in-law, tomorrow she didn’t need to wake up
early to pay respects. If she was the daughter-law, with this kind of attitude
she would be late paying respect to her husband’s parents every day.
Lin Wei Xi stood at the
door and said with a low voice, "Wangye, I'm good."
Gu Hui Yan put down the
book and looked at Lin Wei Xi with her jet-black hair all down. The whole
person was fair and tender, still surrounded by faint water vapor. Standing
under the dim light, it was like a lotus breaking the surface, her beauty seems
out of this world.
The more delicate the
porcelain, the more time it takes to maintain it. Lin Wei Xi was obviously one
of them. However, she was so soft and weak from head to toe, standing at the
door tenderly calling him "Wangye", was this bath really effective?
Gu Hui Yan told himself
that she was a full round younger than him. He promised Lin Yong to take care
of his daughter, and he agreed to marry Lin Wei Xi out of care. If he didn’t
have wisdom for his age, the evening festival
was not guaranteed1.
Gu Hui Yan's Adam's apple
moved up and down, finally restrained himself and withdrew his gaze, and said
to Lin Wei Xi, "You have worked hard all afternoon today. Go rest
early."
"Yes." Lin Wei
Xi also wanted to go to sleep, but her husband was still outside, how could she
casually went to bed by herself. So Lin Wei Xi looked at Gu Hui Yan with wet
eyes and said, "Wangye, it's getting late, you should rest too."
Gu Hui Yan tightened his
fingers, then tightened again, finally put down the book, got up and walked
inside. Lin Wei Xi was very happy to see Gu Hui Yan coming in. She blew out the
candle in the bedroom, leaving only the last lampstand, and then turned to look
at Gu Hui Yan sincerely: "Wangye, why are you still standing?"
Gu Hui Yan looked at Lin Wei
Xi silently, at that moment he admired himself: "Give me the lampstand,
and you can go to sleep first."
Lin Wei Xi left the
lampstand to Gu Hui Yan with confidence, walked into the Babu bed, and lay in
the brocade quilt comfortably. Gu Hui Yan stood in the half-dark bedroom for a
while, wait until he calmed down before he walked in.
However, as soon as Gu Hui
Yan entered, he saw Lin Wei Xi get up in a daze, with a floating voice said:
"Wangye, you are back."
Lin Wei Xi's voice was
very refreshing, unfortunately to turn into scolding words it became delicate. He
already enjoyed listening to it on ordinary days. Now when she was half-asleep,
the words she said could make people soft to the bone.
Gu Hui Yan's eyes unconsciously
darkened: "Why are you still up?"
"I'm waiting for
you."
Gu Hui Yan was silent,
how much did she trust him? As the saying goes, a thing should not be attempted
more than three times. Gu Hui Yan decided to let nature take its course. He sat
on the edge of the bed and helped Lin Wei Xi to lie down, his voice hoarse:
"If you are sleepy, then go to sleep."
Lin Wei Xi gave a low
"um", but still stared at Gu Hui Yan motionlessly. She was really
sleepy, the mist filled her eyes. When a person being looked intently by such
eyes, even a saint wouldn’t be able to hold back.
Moreover, Gu Hui Yan was
not a saint. He leaned over and rubbed Lin Wei Xi's cheek lightly with his
fingers. Unconsciously there was a hint of coaxing in his voice: "Xi'er,
are you very sleepy?"
Lin Wei Xi didn't understand,
so she said lowly, "It's okay."
"That's good."
Before Lin Wei Xi had
time to think about the meaning of this sentence, she was plunged into a vast
ocean. She was actually a little scared of these things, she didn't have much experience
in her previous life, and it really hurt last night. She couldn't understand
why in the book this kind of thing was described as a bliss. But today she
didn't have time to say anything, all the resistance was submerged by the huge
waves. When after much difficulty everything settled down, Lin Wei Xi was
already trembling all over with tears in her eyelashes.
Gu Hui Yan carried Lin Wei
Xi for a brief wash, and then hugged her back to bed. Lin Wei Xi's body was
sore, from beginning to end she didn’t open her eyes, naturally also let Gu Hui
Yan fiddling with her. After everything was tidied up, Gu Hui Yan lay on the outer
side and patted Lin Wei Xi's quilt a little guiltily: "Be good, go to
sleep."
Lin Wei Xi snorted in her
heart, she didn’t have a strength even to move her fingers. Lin Wei Xi was
leaning on her side, her legs slightly bent, her hands on the side of her face,
looking very pitiful. Lin Wei Xi's sleeping posture was not normal, Gu Hui Yan
looked at it for a while, and couldn't help but want to correct it.
For many years in the
military, it’s inevitable to develop an obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Gu Hui Yan tried his best
to straighten Lin Wei Xi’s posture without disturbing her, to sleep properly legs
also need to be straighten. Lin Wei Xi was confused while sleeping, feeling
that Gu Hui Yan disdained her sleeping posture, truly made her fill with anger.
Just a moment ago he moved her back and forth into that kind of position, why
didn't see him dislike her impropriety? Lin Wei Xi felt angry, but she really
didn't have any strength, so she just stretched out her hand to wrap around Gu Hui
Yan's neck and leaned her head against his shoulder, her voice was low almost
inaudible: "No, I will sleep like this."
Gu Hui Yan's hand
stiffened, he paused for a while, and restrainedly reach out to support Lin Wei
Xi's waist. Okay, so be it.
Translator's Rambling: Why most of Chinese novels
always describe that kind of “sport activity” as unpleasant for women?!! They were
not being forced or anything (at least most of them don’t), but it’s more like
you can do it but I don’t like it very much, and they always hurting the next
day, so much so that some of them even couldn’t get out of bed, well I think it’s
also because the bed in the ancient time was not very soft and springy lol…
It seems like if the
author write the female character as willing and enjoying it, that will make
her a bit.. I don’t know, wild I guess, not reserved. But as a reader I want
that!
This is why one of my top
favorite character in Chinese novel is Qu Qing Ju from To Be A Virtuous Wife,
before she had sex for the first time after transmigrating, she thought “To be with
somebody unfamiliar so quickly, there was just a slightest bit of embarrassment.”
How cool is that?!!
1 The evening festival was not guaranteed, it’s Chinese idiom which means that people have reached old age but failed to keep their integrity, It also means that things fail when they were about to succeed.↩
Nah, I can't agree with you, I personally find sex scary even though I haven't experienced it lol
ReplyDeleteNah, I can't agree with you, I personally find sex scary even though I haven't experienced it lol
ReplyDeleteYou'd later change your mind when the time comes. Pf course with the premisw that you found a man who cherish you.
DeleteI believe that even the most inexperienced man would sooner or later learn how to please his wife if she truly hold much value in his heart. He would care whether she enjoys it or not and listen to her, be attentive and not jsut selfishly satisfying himself.
Sex is the most natural thing in the world, there is no reason to fear it.
Oho~ Yan wang~~ when you wanted some comfort from Sister Xi, you called her Xi-er,,? 😏
ReplyDelete😏😏😏
DeleteI'd say the reason the women in novels set in ancient times find sex uncomfortable is because there wasn't a concept of female organism, at least in a number of cultures.
ReplyDeleteAlso, there seems to be a theme that the male leads of these novels can go for hours, meaning the women are all too exhausted to get up the next morning.
I assume you meant 'orgasm' not 'organism'? And yeah, there wasn't much thought for a woman's pleasure during sex for a very long time. I think that was the case even somewhere around 100 years ago, give or take about 20 years. Of course, that's just something I vaguely remember reading somewhere at some unknown point, so don't just take my word for it.
DeleteVocê não precisa voltar tanto, meu marido tem 72 anos agora, ele foi criado assim, o homem não precisa se preocupar se o corpo da mulher já está preparado para receber o dele, tem apenas que se preocupar com seu próprio prazer, já acordei assim, com dor e dificuldade de andar, esse negócio de preliminares pra ele só servia se ele não estivesse muito "aceso" se ele já estivesse, pra que preliminares? E não importava se eu estava cansada ou me sentindo mal, obrigações deveriam ser cumpridas, se vc perguntar porque continuei com ele, eu engravidei rápido e não tinha estudo e nem pra onde voltar
DeleteNão entendi porque o corretor trocou obrigações por investigue
DeleteSinto muito por isso, não tenho nem palavras pra dizer o quão isso é revoltante. Eu Espero que você tenha se distanciado dele agora que seus filhos provavelmente são mais velhos. Nunca é tarde pra ser feliz <3
DeleteI absolutely agree with you. 🤭 I think the author is trying to avoid reader bias against the LWX. They might think she should be shy and innocent about it. Or maybe the author is just setting up Yan Wang so that he becomes better at it and gives her more pleasure? I mean, it's been years since he's had sex and he was very young when he got married the first time. He can still improve and as their feelings grow, they'll enjoy it even more. ☺️
ReplyDeleteI'm glad he was unable to resist her.
Thanks for the update 💕!
At least.. they are not really "nominal husband and wife" in name only 😎😎
ReplyDeletelol the platonic relationship for years is an interesting if unbelievable trope
DeleteI knoooow it’s so annoying, at least in this novel she’s not actively trying to resist him as some kind of weird foreplay, I’ve seen that a lot too. Also, if after sex you are in so much pain you can’t stand up/move, then HE IS DOING IT WRONG seriously.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the translation and the commentary! Gave me a chance to vent lol.
Culture. Chinese culture seems to put emphasis on that a female should put up a front of resistance and be "forced" to enjoy it. In one novel the FL asked how she should behave since she had no experience and she grew up without parents. The other person replied "When it comes to this, females should just resist." From what I can understand it's partly a matter of pride for the man to make the female submit and enjoy it. Chinese culture have after all followed Confucius teachings for a long time which teaches women to be submissive and men to like a submissive wife.
ReplyDeleteChauvinism/sexism. In mentality, feminism, being more liberal etc they're still decades behind us.
ReplyDeleteIt's easier for us to see it because we're ahead on this now, but this isn't/wasn't exclusively Asiatic you know.
(And I'm calling it Asiatic because if you read Japanese and also sooome Korean novels there's this too)
If you read ocidental old romance books though it was the same.
That's why years ago there was sort of a "rape culture" and that it was "normal of a woman to say no" and "when a woman said no, it actually meant yes".
(You might have heard of this)
Because thanks for the church/religion and so on, since early medieval times (maybe before?), women were supposed to be like the Virgin Mary... Except we still had to get pregnant right... No divine conception for us xD
But anyways, that was the behavior a virtuous woman should keep even when she was like, on the 12th birth (and probably closer and closer to dieing because of it).
So even with all those kids, we were still expected to not enjoy/want sex. And if you were a virgin, your value/marriage/future were tied to it, so even more supposed to protect it.
But yeah, even if wanting it you were supposed to say no and put resistance. And of course that meant a hell lot of problems to everyone who actually meant it when saying no.
This isn't even that old. Just watch the older Star Wars movie. Leah and Han romance is crap. And that was it? 70s? Idk.
Actually I recommend searching I think it was Harrison Ford and predatory romance on YouTube.
And it isn't his fault, it's about his movie characters. But it just goes around to show that THAT was considered "normal"/standardized romance.
Women scared as hell/trying to put resistance = she wants it.
And that's movies. On books.. Ugh. Wasn't much difference and was probably worse.
Just to illustrate this isn't exclusive to Chinese novels. It was how it went even here till idk 2000s? 90s?
DeleteIt's more of a chauvinistic society thing. And any country that is years/decades behind will still have it to different degrees.
I also can't stand it anymore, because I mean, regardless of personal opinion it's like "c'mon, someone please do it different. I can't stand more of the same" (and personal opinion only makes it worse "geez what are you teaching young girls/the next generation??")
But what actually made me really surprised were the modern/actual time novels (I usually read/prefer historic)
I remember finally reading a modern one about acting, and getting really surprised that "whaaat. Wth, they use stand ins for a Kiss?? Wth?"
And it was around the same time of the TV anniversary here in my country and I watched sorta of a documentary about it.
And they were talking about the first scene kiss on it on like... 50+ years ago. And proud/celebrating it was the actual actors that did it. And then it moved on to like, other conquests like the first lesbian and then gay kisses etc.
But the first actress talking about how it was taboo on the time, about how it was because I mean, they were married to other ppl...
And I'm like. Ok, China is like 50+ years in the past, they're actually using stand ins for kisses.
And I think lgbtq+ kisses aren't allowed on tv? Maybe not even trans actors/actress?
And actress there still have to shoulder the class prejudice of being "loose"?
(When they are actually using stand ins for kisses! Kisses!! Not even bed scenes!)
It's just like. Wth??
If you're gonna to get the fame/prejudice anyway then at least earn it/go have some fun??
But yeah, sorry for the rant. Just got mind blown with all of that and trying to spread awareness :/
Hope this was eye opening to whoever braved these wall of texts.
Luna
Bed rites. Women in East Asian culture were taught how to act during sex. They were also conditioned to think of it in a certain way. And, to top it with a cherry, female orgasm wasn't considered. The higher class you are, the more the rules are rigid. This is why some men were encouraged by other men to seek out prostitutes or mistresses cause sex with wives were boring due to their etiquette in bed.
ReplyDeleteNot to mention there's still taboo of women enjoying their sexuality. Actresses and other people in the entertainment industry are still looked on with prejudice for kiss scenes. A woman enjoying sex? Maybe after 10 years of marriage, lol. Sex is still a controversial topic in the west, what more more of the east? Though, in other ways, the east is more advanced too—sex is really complicated, for something so quick.
was gonna comment on ya ramblings, but others have said it better.
ReplyDeleteThough to continue on a bit, western romance novels were exactly the same til the 90s.
I find it refreshing to read that sex isn't considered amazing. I know it's a bit of a cultural thing, but I get so tired of media's unrealistic expectations of sex. Some women have difficulty, and some men don't know what they're doing. It's better to go with with low expectations and be pleasantly surprised. None of this constant heavenly experience with handsome men that movies always portray.
ReplyDeleteSeconded. All readings are valid, but I noticed after reading this chapter a second time LWX only describes the first night as really painful. It could also be read as LWX enjoyed herself, but honestly would have preferred the extra hour of sleep. All relationships require adjustment and compromise, and I have faith that LWX and GHY will be able to figure it out because they each respect the other.
DeleteHuh...well, it was first night before and I heard first time hurts.
DeleteThis time she was already tired and half asleep so it makes sense.
Your opinion hold some truth...however
DeleteI believe that even the most inexperienced man would sooner or later learn how to please his wife if she truly hold much value in his heart.
He would care whether she enjoys it or not and listen to her, be attentive and not just selfishly satisfying himself.
Sex is the most natural thing in the world, there is no reason to fear it nor dislike it. Both can enjoy it and learn togethwer if the relationship is really good enough. If there is really love between the couple, there is no reason why sex can't be enjoyful...
Exception only if there is medical situation involved like frigidity, traumatic experiemce or some sorts.
What is annoying is the typical route of describing sex as terrible thing and made the wife can't even wake up from bed...and worse, for 3 days.
What a ridiculous thing to hear from a romance story telling how in love the pair are.
I just can not buy the love declaration thing if one can't even bother to care how miserable the wife after spring night is each time.
It sounds more like experiencing a gang rape than having sex with one's own beloved husband.
I can't believe than a man who truly love a woman would make his woman be tortured like that.
No matter how lustful he is he would hold back if his wife is not well during sex.
Ok but many men were taught women just don't enjoy sex and women were taught the same thing so aside from going to prostitutes how are the supposed to know women can enjoy it? It's not a matter of feelings it's more a matter of knowledge. Also since that is the most vigorous activity many of them face yes they will be sore just like exercising any other muscle. People talk like sex is always so great it rarely is so no ancient women often didn't have fun and didn't know that they could as prostitutes were considered abnormal and lowly. So I appreciate that when I pick up a Chinese romance and am not always picking up what feels like porn with fake moaning actresses. Sometimes it's not fun and you're not used to it why should readers get offended like they've never heard of bad sex 😂
Delete*Cough* I was originally gonna post something light and sarcastic, but then scrolled down to find a super intellectual posivive conversation happening down here. Props to all of you! You've made the internet a better place to live!
ReplyDeleteMe too! I was going to be romantic and say that maybe she will enjoy it more once they confirmed their love ... I hope to see it soon! (This is also one of the reasons why I enjoy BL more 😁)
Deleteprolly cos they dont do foreplay？and well, maybe some women have difficulties getting yknow, wet, and needs lotion or in ancient times, oil to help. also, maybe cos they both are not experiencee enough？i mean, yan wang married his old wife and had 7 yr old kid before she died but only had 1 kid and also cos he is always out in war yknow？and he seems to not have tongfang and all sooooooo maybe he is inexperienced.
ReplyDeleteJust one thing I want to add to the above discussion. I am working my way through NU romance novels: in nearly half of the Chinese novels it seems as if she does not like or enjoy the sex like it is written here BUT in the others it is described the same way with just a few extra words to make it clear that she is unhappy, overtired and plain exhausted because, well, it was too great (overstimulation). Not only Chinese but many Asian sex scenes go in that direction (including all genres and more explicit stuff). It is sometimes hard to read because just a sentence less makes it sound unpleasant. Though I have seen great Chinese drama, where the pairing is in love (and consent) and yet she looks unwilling and like a dead fish during the kissing scene and than that scene ist shown in slomo and several direction for the fans to squeel and it just looks uagh.
ReplyDeleteAnd it seems that Chinese men are studs and experts on the first try... :) This is nice and different, the men are also judged on being virgins and having a clean dating history or at least a simple dating history. They are not judged as harshly as the women but historcally and in "western" culture it is still too often seen as a plus for a man to have "experience" insead of the opposite. So kudos to that.
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ReplyDeleteOMG we are of the same mind cause Qu Qing Ju is the absolute best. I've lost count of how many times I've read To Be A Virtuous Wife. She totally set the standard for me on how women should be and act in all these transmigration novels.
ReplyDeleteI'd agree about many chinese novels, but here i disagree with Wang translator..
ReplyDeleteWhy ?
- Sick body
- Lost her virginity yesterday
- Eww, it's a man in his 30 with few years never doing it, who knows how " motivated " he is
E ela não precisa ter o corpo doente para amanhecer dolorida, basta ser virgem e o companheiro além de não fazer as preliminares por tempo suficiente ( dependendo de quanto a garota demora pra se "molhar") ainda ser afoito, tipo: posições que ele escolheu pra ela ficar, aquela em que o cara coloca as pernas da garota nós ombros, se demorar dez minutos principalmente quando a garota não faz exercícios, pode esperar que no outro dia ela está com dificuldade para andar
DeleteIf the man kiss and touch the girl in the right places and dont go all the way in like a mad man and take his time during penetration the girl won't feel pain, so loosing virginity doesnt have to be painful at all.
DeleteOh! I also love Qu Qing Ju, ive read that novel 4x
ReplyDeleteHehe..right right..well in my opinion, I think it was subconciously because she didn't even enjoy bed activities in her past life...and I think after she'd be tossed by Yan Wang several times, maybe she'll enjoy it in the future especially if she experience having an orgasm..the type when you want to scream and howl when it feels so good right??!!!
ReplyDeleteSo far, very normal sex where both get reciprocated on all levels or at least where the protagonist can keep up with their partners are all from BLs with a few and in-between female protagonists from the QT genre with smut tags.
ReplyDeleteThere's no denial that in all of them, they end up super sore the next day but I suppose that's the only way to illustrate how explosive and exciting their night was since most of those novels cannot have smut content due to censorship. It's a bit of a weird way to indicate how fierce their fun time was but it's a TV drama trope that kind of stuck around.
In this case, you'd have to also consider that the female lead is inexperienced, she probably is extremely tense which obv. for those who know from experience, doesn't help even if your partner is good.
On top of that, ladies in the past don't go to the gym or exercised on a regular basis like runs/hike/jog. Their stamina is basically shit. Especially for a sickly girl like her who can't even handle getting hit by wind or rain.
And if you'd pair her up with a military guy who hasn't had the time to do it and is a buffy war lord....
Agree with the translator...Quqingju is one of the best ahhahaha
ReplyDeleteI mean it's her first nights of course it's gonna hurt, especially when the dude just dives in on her first time without hearing her up first to be well lived up.
ReplyDeleteAnd here it's kind of the same, hasn't slept well and feels all sore from yesterday and again just dunks her like that.
Girls need more care those first few times, in a while she'll be enjoying the pampering.
" She is the protagonist" in that series various girls have sex and they all enjoy it.
To be a virtuous wife is one of my favorites as well!
ReplyDeleteAbout Translator Ramblings: I wonder the same. Even in novels set up in modern times it is the same. I just read once Trial Marriage Husband Need to Work Hard that sex between them were not explicit but at least the descriptions we know that they enjoyed be together, they kissed, hugged, touch each other, etc. The same happen with BL novels, sex for the bottom means pain, even in some stories involved blood, and a lot of them there is rape. I just don't understand why sex is portrayed like that between couples. If the woman feel pain during sex it is because something is not done right as it should be.
ReplyDeletePor isso eu gosto tanto do Imperatriz de linhagem militar. Pq a Shen Miao e o Litle Marques Xi não ficam com essas graças. A shen miao até testa várias posições (do livro amarelo q ensinava a fazer tudo) e no outro dia faz o trabalho de casa normalmente. Ela n ficava q nem um peixe morto deixando o cara fazer o q quisesse
ReplyDeleteI actually don't finding it necessary to have sex on their wedding night, coz most of these Chinese novels have arranged marriages and at that time, you don't even know that person well enough so for the girl, its like sleeping with a stranger and that's why they feel uncomfortable and pain and that's not considering how these MLs go at it almost the entire night( seriously, is this even possible??) Anyway, what I'm trying to say is if they could be given a chance to get to know each other and for the attraction to develop then maybe sex wouldn't be that bad for these women
ReplyDelete